孩子的祈禱
Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents house。 At bedtime， the two boys knelt beside their beds to say their prayers， when the younger one began praying at the top of his lungs: "I pray for a bicycle。 I pray for a new toy。"
兩個小男孩在祖父母家過夜。睡覺的時候，兩個小男孩跪在牀邊開始祈禱，這時小一些的孩子扯開嗓子大聲喊道：“我祈求得到一輛自行車。我祈求有一個新玩具。”
His older brother leaned over， nudged him and said， "Why are you shouting your prayers? God isnt deaf。"
他的哥哥靠過來，用肘輕碰他説：“你為什麼這麼大聲喊叫呢？上帝又不是聾子。”
To which the little brother replied， "No， but Grandma is!"
弟弟回答説：“是的，可是奶奶聽不到呀！”
三隻烏龜
Three turtles decided to have a cup of coffee。 Just as they got into the cafe， it started to rain。
The biggest turtle said to the smallest one， " Go home and get the umbrella。"
The little turtle replied， "I will， if you dont drink my offee。"
"We wont，" the other two promised。
Two years later the big turtle said to the middle turtle， "Well， I guess he isnt ing back， so we might as well drink his coffee。"
Just then a voice called from outside the door， "If you do， I wont go。"
三隻烏龜決定去喝咖啡。它們剛到咖啡店的門口，就下起雨來。於是最大的那隻烏龜對最小的烏龜説，“回家去取傘吧。”
最小的烏龜説，“如果你們不把我的咖啡喝了，我就去。”
“我們不喝，”另外兩隻烏龜答應説。
兩年後，大烏龜對中烏龜説，“好吧，我猜他肯定不回來了，我們能夠把它的咖啡喝掉了。”
正在這時，一個聲音從門外傳來，“你們要是喝了，我就不去。”
A Useful Way 一個有效的方法
Father: Jack， why do you drink so much water?
Jack: I have just had an apple， Dad。
Father: What"s that got to do with it?
Jack: I forgot to wash the apple。
爸爸：傑克，你幹嘛喝這麼多水呀？
傑克：我剛才吃了個蘋果，爸爸。
爸爸：可是這跟喝水有什麼關係呢？
傑克：我忘了洗蘋果呀。
A professor was giving a big test one day to his students。 He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait。
Once the test was over the students all handed the tests back in。 The professor noticed that one of the students had attached a $100 bill to his test with a note saying "A dollar per point。"
The next class the professor handed the tests back out。 This student got back his test and $64 change。
一天，教授正在給學生們監考。他發下試卷，然後回到講台前等待。
考試結束了，學生們紛紛交回試卷。教授發現一張試卷上彆着一張百元鈔票，還有一張紙條寫着：“一分一塊錢。”
第二堂課，教授把試卷都發回學生們手中。其中一個學生不但得到了試卷還得到64塊錢的找零。
Guest: "Why does your dog sit there and watch me eat?"
Hotel Host: "I cant imagine， unless its because you have the plate he usually eats from。"
客人：“為什麼你的狗狗坐在那兒老是看着我吃東西呢？”
旅館主人：“我不敢想象，除非是因為你拿了它經常用來吃東西的盤子了。”
我根本就看不見
After supper， the parents were busy playing mah-jong with the guests。 At this point the mother thought of something and said to her son who was watching TV， "Honey， go see if the kitchen light is on or not?" After a while， her son returnedand said， "Ma， the kitchen is so dark that I cannot see it at all。"
晚飯後，父親和母親都忙着和客人玩麻將，這時母親忽然想起點兒事來，便對正在看電視的兒子説道：“寶貝，去看看廚房裏的燈是不是還開着呢？” 過了一會兒，兒子回來説：“媽，廚房裏太黑了，我根本就看不見。”
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