兩塊蛋糕
Tom: Mom, can I have two pieces of cake, please?
Mom: Certainly -- take this piece and cut it two!
湯姆:媽媽,我可以吃兩塊蛋糕嗎?
媽媽:當然可以----拿這塊蛋糕把它切成兩塊吧!
uareonly65,ybodyelseisntheir70s,80s,ensomethinghastobemoved,liftedorloaded,theyyell,“Getthekid.”
這裏想對將要退休者提一點忠告。如果你只有65歲的話,
千萬別進退休社區。因為那裏人人都七八十歲或者八九十歲了。每當要搬東西,抬東西或者裝東西時,他們就叫喊,“讓小的幹吧。”
Dentist: I'm sorry,madam,but I'll have to charge you twenty-five dollars for pulling your son's tooth.
Mother: Twenty-five dollars! But I thought you only charged five dollars for an extraction.
Dentist: I usually do. But your son yelled so loud,he scared four other patients out of the office.
昂貴的代價
牙科醫生:對不起,夫人,為給您的兒子拔牙,我得收二十五美元。
母親:二十五美元!可是我明白您拔一顆牙只要五美元呀?
牙科醫生:是的。可是您兒子這麼大聲地叫喚,他都嚇跑四位病人了。
媽媽不見了
A little girl was lost, so she went up to a policeman and said, “l've lost my moml” The cop said,“What's she like?” The little girl replied,"Shopping and gossiping!”
有一個小女孩走丟了,於是她走到一個警察跟前説:“我媽媽不見了!”這個警察説:“她什麼樣子?”小女孩回答:“買東西和説閒話!”
Bring me the winner
Waiter, this lobster has only one claw.
I'm sorry, sir. It must have been in a fight.
Well, bring me the winner then.
服務員,
這個龍蝦只有一隻爪。
對不起,先生,這隻肯定打過架了。
哦, 那給我那個打贏的吧。